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Conditions of Use

If you do use the message boards you agree to be bound by the current Conditions of Use and to review them periodically as part of your agreement to them.

You are also bound to this agreement under the Terms and Conditions of Use.

The message board forums are open to anyone, male or female, of any age who has experienced sexual abuse and/or sexual violence. We also welcome their partners, family and friends.

Some of the main topics you can access on the message boards include:

Support Forum: Find support and share experience in a safe space. 
Discussion Forum: Debate and discuss issues in this open forum: 
Chat Forum: Chat and have a natter

General Rules

Duplicate Accounts (more than one account) are not permitted. Do not reapply. If you've forgotten your password, call our office or email us instead.

The message boards are NOT the appropriate forum for conversation that includes threats to commit suicide, hurt yourself (including self-injury), or detailed accounts that express either of these things are currently taking place. Whilst you may want to discuss suicidal feelings and seek support anything that is graphic or expresses serious intent is inappropriate, instead of posting such messages we would ask that you seek immediate and appropriate help. If you are in immediate danger you should call your Doctor, therapist, a family member or friend, or a local emergency number such as the Samaritans or Dublin Rape Crisis (both of which operate 24 helplines). This is in your best interests and for the comfort and safety of all chat members.

If you are seventeen years of age or younger you are not permitted to use the chat forums at all.

In particular the Support Space is for people looking for support or wish to share feelings and experiences with others. If you are not prepared to talk about issues related to that, then you should post in another room such as the Discussion or Chat forums.

All rooms are not meant to be a replacement for professional therapy or support group, but meant to provide a supportive atmosphere for people who need to share feelings and experiences with others. It is important to remember that most of the other users who will be present in the rooms are also looking for support, and hence not trained in providing support or advice, but who can only speak from experience, and who (in some cases) are dealing with a lot of serious issues themselves.

It is important to remember that one of the "common" traits of having experienced sexual abuse is to isolate yourself from other people in "real-time" and relying on support rooms such as this can feed into that behavior... in other words, it is important for you and we recommend that you find other means of support such as professional one-to-one or group therapy, etc.

The One in Four forums ARE NOT meant for users to conduct research for newspaper articles, book reports, research papers, a college thesis, etc. They are for people who have experienced sexual abuse, or their friends and family, to find support.

If you are looking to do research for a project or if you are a reporter please explore the site and contact the office if you cannot find what you need or if you intend to use any of the "materials" from the site. Do not harass chatters with questions or comments. It is simply not permitted.

The One in Four forums are an inappropriate forum to ask people for pictures of themselves for any reason. Research is not tolerated. Asking for photos or people's personal experience of sexual abuse or any other private personal details is not ok.

For safety purposes and because of the forums, we strongly discourage users from openly exchanging information such as their last name, mailing address or phone number. If you find you would like to correspond without another user outside the rooms we recommend that you first, in private, exchange e-mail addresses.

Please note that some statements you post may be actionable for defamation, invasion of privacy, or other legal cause of action. People intending to post must avoid comments that are false and injurious to others. In particular please do not under any circumstances name your abuser on this site as this opens up the possibility of yourself liable for slander and its likely you will damage any legal proceedings that could take place (even if its another person).

Also, by posting on these forums, you are accepting complete responsibility and will hold One in Four harmless for any legal claims based upon or relating to the message posted.One In Four reserves the right to disclose any information about postings, including identifying information, to satisfy criminal and/or legal inquiries.

Additional Activities Not Permitted: Lurking, harassment, verbal abuse of another user, intimidating, flooding, flaming, racist comments, impersonating authorised users/other individuals, knowingly supplying misleading or incorrect information to One in Four about other users or to other users and spamming in general is not permitted. Advertisements of products or other websites which contradict what the discussion, chat and support forums are intended to be will also be deleted (if you are in doubt as to whether a link is suitable you should contact the office). Initiation or participation in any such activity will cause you to be banned from chatting in any of the forums. One in Four reserves the right to immediately terminate or suspend access to our forums for conduct that we believe interferes with anyone’s support and safety and that is in clear violation of the conditions of use.

Emotional Responsibility to Yourself: It is not your responsibility to take on the problems of each individual that enters the message board, nor are you responsible for their actions within or outside the boards. Ultimately, the number one person you are responsible for is yourself... if you find the conversation within the room board is becoming counter-productive for you personally, because of it's nature, (but not disruptive as a whole), then it is your responsibility to excuse yourself, leave the message and come back at a later time. It is important to keep in mind that there are often sensitive issues discussed in the support space and everyone is at a different place in relation to their experience. For example: if someone in the support space is discussing issues surrounding abuse as a child, and you are experiencing difficulty with what is being said, it is not up to you or the rest of the participants to censor the individual discussing the issue... but it is up to you to decide if it will help or harm you to stay, and then to follow through with leaving if that is your choice. Ultimately, it is up to all of us to make productive choices for ourselves, to learn to support and take care of ourselves, and not just others.


What they do

Moderators for the forums will not only enforce the rules but can and will remove you/delete or edit posts from a forum if you are not following the guidelines. Anyone who continues to break the rules will denied access from chatting in these forums (for a period of time).

It is at the sole discretion of the Moderators to remove a user from the forums, to move a user to another forum, or to ban a user completely from access to the all forums altogether.

Moderators are usually present in the room to attempt to maintain a certain amount of order. The Moderators are just present to help and ensure a safe and healthy environment for everyone. Once you have completed reading these Conditions Of Use and you are entirely happy with them you should proceed to register yourself to access the forums.

What do they not do

Moderators in general do not interact on the boards rather, instead they provide a friendly ear to hear what difficulties you may have using them. If you experience any difficulties please do not hesitate to contact one of them.

Contacting a Moderator and response times

Sometimes there may be a delay in getting a response in which case we also suggest you contact the office directly if the matter becomes urgent.

When emailing to raise a concern/issue:

Please note that when One in Four responds, it does not neccessarily mean that the individual member of staff who was emailed by you will respond as another member of staff may be responsible for that particular issue or indeed be dealing with the query.
Contact with One in Four is obviously confidential which will mean that issues relating to other users will not be disclosed to any other user and will not be placed on the messageboard forums.

General netiquette on the boards:

Please be courteous of others in the message boards.

Think about the content of your post before you share it.

Remember and try to create a space for others to share and express their own views, thoughts and feelings not just your own.

If your post is likely to be a trigger to others please make this clear by inserting (trigger) beside the title or in your response.

Avoid posting anything unnecessarily provocative or triggering for the sake of it.

Stick to the original post topic and post in the correct space e.g. support, discussion, chat etc.

Be responsible firstly to yourself, and then to others, and remember that there are services to provide appropriate support should you be self harming, feeling suicidal, experiencing domestic violence etc.

By everyone following these guidelines it will help to create a community space that everyone will want to use.

If an individual repeatedly ignores these netiquette guidelines aforementioned, then, a moderator may delete or modify such postings accordingly.

We also ask you as a user of the boards to commit to ensuring this open, respectful culture is upheld.

You can do so when you witness a break in the messageboard netiquette by

1.      ‘Gently’ pointing this out to the individual concerned.

2.      If unsuccessful, please contact a moderator.

The moderator will, upon being notified do the following

3.      Validate the break in netiquette and bring it to the attention of the individual concerned again. If unfounded the moderator contact both parties.

4.      Delete, modify posts accordingly and the moderator may suspend or prevent the individual from access


There are often times when conversations get emotionally intense, including the use of graphic language. This is permitted in the proper context, but we ask that you try to remain respectful of other people in the room. Although honest discussion and debate is encouraged in all of the messageboard forums, we request you refrain from any harassment, flaming and threatening behaviour towards others.

There are often times when conversations get emotionally intense, including the use of graphic language. This is permitted in the proper context, but we ask that you try to remain respectful of other people in the room. Although honest discussion and debate is encouraged in all of the messageboard forums, we request you refrain from any harassment, flaming and threatening behaviour towards others.

It is your responsibility to leave the space and return at a later time, if the conversations are counter-productive, or triggering bad memories for you. If you have a issue with a particular member (or the content of his/her postings) we suggest that you deal with this matter outside the forum via email with them and/or contacting One in Four directly (if there has been any offensive posts made) as soon as possible.

AGAIN, for the safety of everyone, please place all posts liable to be graphic, triggering or upsetting within the Support Space. If you do decide to post in the other discussions we ask you to be mindful of the fact that these are not the forums for such messages and we may have to move/delete them.

We also ask that users of the website in particular respect each individuals personal privacy. As you can imagine this is different for each person concerned, some people need complete confidentiality. This means that its not ok to disclose names,details of,drop in/group conversations or indentifying information of them accessing services of One in Four or otherwise.   

Being harrassed/ receiving inappropiate post?

If you find yourself in a position whereby you are being threatened, flamed or harassed or receiving inappropriate email/posts from a board member or any other source, please report it to by contacting the One In Four offfice on 01 662 4070 Monday to Friday 09:30 to 17:30.

We would like to point out that it is not the duty of One in Four to resolve personality clashes/conflict and that the message boards are not the forums to do that in.

Please do not demand attention of particular staff members on the message board forums in relation to concerns you have, we would rather you contact the office directly. If you have a particular issue or difficultly with a staff member in any way then we suggest you contact the office also.

Note* Personal arguments and messages that repeatedly encourage or blame individuals will be removed. This applies to anyone who becomes involved in the argument and uses the boards as forums to do that.If an individual ignores clearly ignores this then One in Four will revoke their access permanently.

What happens if your post is deleted?
In some instances such posts will have to be removed without consultation and without anyone contacting the office. In such instances a reason will be sent to the person who posted (providing there is a email address supplied)

How Do I Amend or Change my Pasword?
You need to send a email to 
reception at requesting access or register yourself.

Even if you just wish to read posts and personally you feel you cant post anything just now you still can apply to have access to this space.The minimum you need to get yourself registered on the boards is the following (all of this information can be anonymous).

1. Email Address
2. Username
3. A Password you will easily remember.

Can I be anonymous?
To get access people can use an anonymous name and email for the board if they wish.

How will it be kept secure and safe?
We have adopted the following privacy policy. In addition to this should anyone be offensive within the message boards and start sending offensive emails we can remove their access rights and ban their IP address.

Right to change or review personal information

At any time you have the right to ask us to change or view your personal details which we need to hold in order to grant you access to the support space (e.g email address and name). This is entirely your right (under The Data Protection Act) as you may have used your real personal details when you applied to be given access.  

Access to the Message Boards and ending support
Access to the forums is for an indefinite period, as long as we have a name and email address to identify each individual and hence provide you with a password. At any time it is entirely your right to ask us to remove your access rights to the support space and effectively delete the information we hold on you as a result. To do this all you have to do is email reception at Once she has deleted your details she will send you a confirmation email. If you do not receive this we ask that you call the office durning normal working hours to ensure that your request has been acted upon.There is no limit on the number of repeat applications and requests for access to the support space and ending your access to it

What if you have any suggestions?
One In Four welcomes any suggestions that will improve this online community, including any changes of these ground rules so dont be afraid to contact us on what you think or if you are unsure of anything we have said above.

Send your comments and suggestions to...

reception at

Wish to proceed?

Unfortunately we are experiencing some technical difficulties with the message boards at the moment, please bear with us while we rectify matters. Thank you in advance for your patience and understanding.


Contact information

Support and resources for people who have experienced sexual abuse and/or sexual violence.